Clogging my arteries, all for my faithful readers
Mood:  hungry
Topic: Totally Betty
The United had a sale on Ben & Jerry's, so of course I had to go apeshit and stock up the freezer. Their selection was kinda blah, but there were a couple flavors I figured I just had to let you guys know about, just in case you have not yet tried them.

Dig in...

Ooo pretty
Mood:  smelly
Topic: Self-referential topic
Got tired of that plain brown wrapper look and decided to update the look around here. Of course, I've been wanting to do this for a while, but that plain look was the only acceptable template that Tripod had in their list. Yes, I'm too lazy to figure out how to make my own blog style thingy. This one is called 'Camo' and I think it looks pretty zippy, even if the dividers are goofy little lines of stars. It would be nice to have some sort of Random Commentary banner at the top, but we'll survive without it. Remember - too lazy to do it myself.

Babies!
Mood:  special
Topic: Life in Texas
No, not kittens - fish. See, we keep goldfish in the stock tank to eat mosquito larvae. We've had to buy a few dozen to keep them going, and when I go out to check the cattle I usually peep out the fish to see how they're doing.

Well a couple days ago I noticed that there were a few little teeny ones among the big fat ones. The only explanation is that they're actually breeding in there. The hubby always says "No they won't do that because they eat the babies" but there's no way any would have stayed that tiny since the last time we added new fish. I mean, this is why they lay masses of eggs, right? The power of survival through numbers.

So anyway, we have baby fish - at least for now. I'll have to peep in on them in a few days to make sure they didn't get eaten by the big ones.

Bang bang bang bang bang bang
Mood:  happy
Topic: Life in Texas
We have a new roof. Well, most of one anyway. The shingly bits aren't on but the actual wood part is up and being roofy. No, not like the date rape drug but like a structure that won't leak when it rains.

We've been waiting on this for weeks. We've been "on the top of my list" for most of that time. Then another handyman type guy comes around, gets us situated with a new back door and rail, and the hubby gets him paid up to get a new roof hammered on top of the house. (Oh, by the way, did I mention we have a new back door and a nice hand rail? Well we do, and they're quite nice.) A crew of guys showed up this morning and woke me up scraping and banging on the roof - and I was glad to hear it.

So I figure they should show up again some time tomorrow to stick the shingles on. Then, when they're done, I'll have to let the cattle out of their pen. Whee! New roof!

Well, so much for that project
Mood:  not sure
Topic: Head games
It looks like the blogging of Briar County Blues is at an end. This is due to missing archive posts, laziness on the part of yours truly as editor, and a feeling that it isn't necessary anyway. The game itself is still going fine. Slow, but fine.

Now I guess I can free up the time I wasn't using to edit it to not do some other writing project.

Moo!
Mood:  lazy
Topic: Life in Texas
We have 11 head of cattle now. 2 of them are currently penned up because their testicles are giving me grief. The black bull has been giving me attitude the past couple weeks, so his balls have to come off. I also got to chase half of our new ones the other day because they managed to get loose. It's a huge pain in the ass trying to herd cattle with only 1 person.

And there is your cattle report. Tune in next week when our big bulls become big steers.

Strange little meme
Mood:  lazy
Topic: Various webshit
Stole this off of Satanosphere. Don't tell anybody.

Instructions: Go to your iTunes/media player and put it all on shuffle. Say the following questions aloud, and after each one press play. Use the song title as the answer to the question.

What do you think of me, Rio Nitrus mp3 Player?
Subbacultcha - the Pixies

Will I have a happy life?
Deity - Ministry

What do my friends really think of me?
I Should Know - Dirty Vegas

Do people secretly lust after me?
Leave Home - the Chemical Brothers

How can I make myself happy?
Cowtown - They Might Be Giants

What should I do with my life?
Green Grow the Rushes - REM

Why must life be so full of pain?
My Friend Goo - Sonic Youth

How can I maximize my pleasure during sex?
Song to the Siren - the Chemical Brothers

Will I ever have children?
She's an Angel - They Might Be Giants

Will I die happy?
Confusion [Pump Panel Reconstruction Mix] - New Order [Blade Soundtrack]

Can you give me some advice?
Gangster Tripping - Fatboy Slim

What do you think happiness is?
Jezebel - 10,000 Maniacs

What's my favorite fetish?
Against All Odds - Dune

I'm fixing to jinx a good thing
Mood:  surprised
Topic: Life in Texas
How much more fucking rain are we going to get this month?

There, I said it. I know that the usual complaint is that there is no rain, and that the drought conditions are killing the crop - but for fuck's sake can we spread the precipitation over a longer period please? The humidity is driving me crazy!

But that's not the worst part. It hailed yesterday. Psycho ass chunks of ice pelting down. Okay, so it wasn't anything emergency-ish like softball sized, but they were still the size of ice cubes and it was freaky. It didn't help at all that the front doorknob decided to be a total bitch and not cooperate, so we had to take the damn thing off so we could let the kitties in the house until the rain of death lightened up. Oy, what a weekend.

So now we get to smell the wet stink of dairies for another couple weeks, and we still haven't gotten the other farm planted because it's too mushy out there to run a tractor. Crazy weather, calm it down. You know, just a little bit.

The cold cruel world
Mood:  celebratory
Topic: Life in Texas
The kitties are all now banished outside. They didn't do anything specific, they're just big enough to handle it and I'm tired of bothering to try taming the last few when they so obviously aren't interested.

Now, of course, when I went out to visit with the whole crowd, the ones that weren't particularly tame were all cute and climbing on me and friendly. No you little bastards, you can't come back in the house.

So tomorrow or sometime around then I'll put the cage away, clean up the mess that was in it, and I'll be able to get to the front door easily again.

They're so cute in a pile on the front porch!

Let's go sexin'
Mood:  caffeinated
Topic: Brain candy
A Dirty Shame deserves every bit of the NC-17 rating it got. This movie is decadent, perverted, trashy, raunchy and funny as fuck.

Every time I get that stupid survey/meme question 'What famous person do you want to meet/have lunch with/go on a killing spree with?' I had no idea that I was lying every time. I want to meet John Waters. I want to stalk him. I want John Waters to give me a look of terrible disdain and dismiss me so I can have a story about how one of the coolest ever filmmakers totally dissed me. John Waters, I bow to you.

Anyway, A Dirty Shame is so fucking funny, I nearly peed myself in the first half hour. They couldn't have done any better than Tracy Ullman in the lead role, and having Johnny Knoxville as Ray Ray was fantastic. The movie just plain rocks. If you can't handle the vulgar and gratuitous celebration of oddball sex then you'd be better off avoiding this movie. But if you get a giggle at the thought of a payday or spontaneous nudity, then you just gotta see this.